It hurt me.

maybe saying any of this is not gonna change anything. 

i miss you sandratan.

i didn't know you were pissed from the start.

i didn't know you were trying to be good with me.

but when you said never, i was really sad. 

because i dunno what i did wrong . AGAIN

i didn't understand why you dun wan to tell me once you were unhappy.

i didn't understand why when i told you i thought sarah and u were pissed at me you didn't wan to reply.

until i ask the second time then you admitted.

why you had to keep me in the dark.

i thought we were good. i thought we were still friends, even when it wasn't GOODFRIENDS.

im sorry if i stick to cheryl more. im sorry if that is the impression i gave you.

im sorry if i seldom talked to you.

im sorry if i called you fake after you told me.

because the first thing that came to my mind was, 

why didn't you tell me. why did you still have to TRY to be good.

why did you choose to cover what you truly feel.

im sorry if i didn't know you were TRYING.

because i didn't know you were unhappy.

im sorry if i did anything wrong again to upset you.

i hope you would explain to me.

it's okay if you dun wan to.

im sorry if calling you fake hurt you so much.

WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU WERE UNHAPPY. 

WHY DID YOU CHOOSE TO TRY AND COVER THINGS UP. 

WHYWHYWHY. 

I DUN WAN TO CRY BECAUSE OF THIS ANYMORE.

I DUN WAN TO LOSE YOU ALL

AND QUARREL

AND HAVE SO MANY MISUNDERSTANDINGS

AND HAVE THIS CYCLE REPEATED ONCE EVERY FEW MONTHS.

i saw your fb. you dun even feel sad. but i am sad.

why aren't you sad.

do i mean so little to you?

im sorry. i can say a thousand sorries to you even if i dun know what's wrong.

but will you accept?

sandra..

i hope to hear your side of this.

and in the end. we would just be lyke " hello, can we be friends ? "